It is no surprise to me that hardly anyone tells the truth about how they feel. The smart ones keep themselves to themselves for good reason. Why would you want to tell anyone anything that’s dear to you? Even when you like them and want nothing more than to be closer than close to them? It’s so painful to be next to someone you feel strongly about and know you can’t say the things you want to.
I don’t know how to speak what I’m feeling. I don’t know what I’m fucking feeling. All I know is that there’s an empty space. There’s a hole in my chest. I can smile and I can laugh. But when there’s a silence, and there’s nothing to distract me, the sadness will seep back inn. And the loneliness will take me over once again.